


On Your Left

by Holmesslice



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M, Other, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-25
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2019-07-02 04:17:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15788796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Holmesslice/pseuds/Holmesslice
Summary: Sam Wilson has two soul marks, a fairly uncommon experience, whose identities surprises him.





	1. On Your Left

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in 2014. Crippling self-doubt made me question if what I was writing was good, plausible and any other excuse to not write or post. And for years my doubt won, until now...
> 
> A lot of research went into this. I wanted to make Sam from a neighborhood near where Rogers and Barnes grew up. I wanted to include characters from Barnes's family that are from the comics. I wanted to include some about Sam's pararescue training. It's not as fleshed out as I'd like, I'm still growing on how to take what I learn through research and constructing a well-written narrative.
> 
> I know I took some artistic license with some of Sam's origins. So please bear those choices.
> 
> There's going to be two parts to this. The second is likely not going to be as lengthy. I wanted to write more from Sam's perspective, and life rather than Rogers and Barnes.
> 
> (Edited to add that this was not complete, I had forgotten to check it, sorry about this)

**On Your Left**

 

Samuel Thomas Wilson, born September 23rd, 1978, from Vinegar Hill, Brooklyn had been born with his soulmark. Two of them actually, while not unheard of, was rare enough to be seen as odd, weird and at worst something to hate. At first, both started with what looked like a birthmark; its words could not be easily read. As Sam aged, the soulmark slowly came into sharper focus. The summer before kindergarten was when the Wilson family was able to read both soulmarks with ease. Sam had come running in from the street, soaking wet from playing in the street’s hydrant, screaming about how one of his marks could be read.  

 

“On your left, on your left” was marked on the left side of his ass. It was the one Sam couldn’t read. In his excitement of being to read his other soulmark he knew the other could be read. He dropped his shorts to his mother’s voice shouted gaily “Sam!” who then read it out loud. It meant his soulmate was going to be a smart ass his father commented with a chuckle. Sam gasped, and pointed to his dad shouting, “Language! Dad has to pay a dollar!” Sam’s mother came out from the kitchen handing Sam’s dad with the “swear jar.” Soulmarks were marked in the soulmate’s own handwriting. The soulmark was written in very upright handwriting, a no frills, straight to the point, kind of person. It wasn't the neatest handwriting Sam had seen though. His grandmother coming to mind whose cursive was a thing of art.

 

“Who are… help me?” marked his pubic region. The scrawl was very much unlike the one on his ass. It seemed uncertain and maybe a little timid. Sam often asked out loud why he was feeling protective over the mark. His parents smiled telling him that it was because Sam was a nurturer and compassionate. He cared about people and wanted to make them feel better.

 

When soulmarks had first appeared many had proclaimed this proved the existence of souls and more than that proved that certain relationships were divined by God. However when those with multiple soulmarks, or occurred in relationships that were deemed deviant--homosexual,  interracial, polyamorous and others or those who were blank that’s when many hid their soulmarks while activist groups were formed to help fight against the intolerance or added to already formed activist groups such as the ACLU.

 

Sam’s parents were open, loving and encouraging. They never let Sam feel bad about his soulmarks for any reason. Especially because of what society purported during the turbulent and less tolerant times. Sam’s parents had always been encouraging and open whenever he’d come home from a classmate’s home talking about what he heard their parents say about soulmarks. They’d take the time to explain to him what people thought and how it was senseless hatred seeped in intolerance and ignorance much like how people hated them because of the color of their skin.

 

In the second grade before class one of his best friends, Anijah had been talking about playing house at recess. They both stood under the jungle gym talking about who was going to play the father, mother, so on and so forth. Another of his friends, Leon, had joined into play. It was there that Anijah assigned Sam as husband and Leon as the husband. Sam’s heartbeat quickened in a way that a seven year child couldn’t quite fully understand but on some level did. He only remembered Anijah officiating the marriage and Leon and Sam kissing each other briefly on the lips because that was what married couples did at a wedding. Sam had been to two weddings and was a ring bearer at one, he knew this.

 

He didn’t fully understand his feelings. Sam only knew that he liked Leon much in the same way he liked a girl in his class earlier in the year named Gina. He liked everyone but Gina and Leon were different. Just like Anijah was a different kind of different as well, “in different sort of way from the other different sort of way,” Sam would explain with his parents smiling whenever he’d talk about Gina, Leon, Anijah and his days at school.

 

Leon and Sam didn’t quite understand when Leon’s parents had demanded a parent-teachers conference with Sam’s parents. What resulted was a brief detention for Sam and Leon being moved into another class. While rumors didn’t start (somehow Leon’s parents urged this greatly Sam remembered as he sat in the chair staring intently at his sneakers while Leon did the same across the room). Sam knew he was different. It was yet another kind of difference. Though unlike the other types of differents, it was enough that Sam felt ashamed and guilty. It was a difference he knew he’d never be allowed himself to feel even if his parents loved him, encouraged him. The rest of the world didn't feel that way and it had gotten him in trouble. He remembered the extra hugs and kisses his parents gave him.

 

“Dad, what does ‘on your left, on your left’ mean?” Sam, ten years old, asked.

 

“It means that a jogger was passing you and was giving you a warning,” his dad replied.

 

“But it happens twice!” Sam replied confused. He was a fast runner. How could someone pass him twice?

 

“It means the jogger passed you twice, likely faster than you,” his dad responded, affectionately rubbing Sam’s head, “now come here and give me a hand with dinner.”

 

Sam grumbled while he helped prepare dinner about how he had been the fastest runner in class and maybe even in the entire school. He talked about how he had even outrun the sixth grader in field day. His dad smiled as they talked about Sam joining track.

 

All Sam knew was that he wanted to be number one. He was extremely studious nearly always earning top marks. He didn’t always get number one. His arch nemesis being his best friend Anijah. It was always in good fun as they spurned each other on to do their best.

 

Sam and Anijah liked each other (but Sam giving his different speech to his parents). They’d play together. They’d go to the movies with their classmates to see the latest Disney production (previous ones being The Great Mouse Detective, Flight of the Navigator). They’d play in the vacant lot usually soccer or stickball.

 

When Sam’s parents splurged on a VCR player with a really cool car that rewinded the tapes, he would invite some of his classmates to watch. Always age appropriate as his mother would reassure the other parents. Though Sam didn't always understand why some of the parents seemed to hate Disney movies though deep down he knew that wasn't the case but didn’t like the way it made him feel. Even though he couldn't fully put it into words he knew it was something more complicated, something that hurt him more than some kid’s parents not wanting them to spend time at his apartment. His parents always told him that there would be people like that but he should always put his happiness and safety first.

 

In high school, Sam had his first love, Jack. The two met each other in freshman year both trying out for track and field. The two took to each other like two peas in a pod.

 

Jack soon became the third to the Sam and Anijah duo. The three hung out together each talking to each other on a conference call sharing their fears, dreams, who they liked, the homework and so much more. Jack and Sam pestered Anijah about her classmate in her AP chemistry class. Sam had decided to pursue mathematics while Jack took to the humanities.

 

“His name's Scott,” Anijah gushed, “he's a couple years older. He's so dreamy! Plus we like some of the same bands, the same movies,...”

 

That's when Sam and Jack promised to have Anijah’s back. Soon enough Anijah and Scott were going steady under the watchful eye of his parents and grandmother. Then they were under the watchful eye of Jack’s grandparents and Sam's parents. Anijah would sometimes huff in frustration but accepted that everyone was overprotective.

 

One Saturday afternoon Scott had invited Anijah, Sam, and Jack to his house. There they met Scott's grandmother and his parents. The home smelled of good Italian food, and filled with knick knacks from through the decades.

 

Scott's grandmother had brought out slices of zuppa Ingles accompanied with large glasses of milk. All of the teens eagerly tucked into the Italian dessert. Both Sam and Jack smiling from ear to ear at how good it was. They loudly complemented Scott's grandmother. Scott and Anijah flirted with each other teasing each other, feeding each other for full of cake. Scott's grandmother laughed out loud remembering with bittersweet memories of a pair of boys that meant the world to her.

“Spitting image of my brother only not as mischievous. He was always after a dame as if he thought we didn't know. His heart was already taken. To the end of the line for those two,” Scott’s grandmother mused, “now who wants to help me with supper?”

 

Anijah and Scott made quite the pair. Each both loved science sometimes making chemistry jokes, laughing at their own humor. Sam and Jack would look on, smiling, shoulders touching and each giving each other small, shy glances. It was the same feeling with Leon, Gina, and a few others. It was a different kind of different. A blooming warm kind of different.

 

Jack and Sam listened on at Scott's dining room table as Anijah and Scott spoke with each other. Sam's left hand on the table next to Jack’s right hand. Sam took a gulp and leaned his pinkie over Jack's pinkie. Sam felt Jack stiffen and dreaded the possibility of rejection. Then he felt Jack move his finger affectionately encouraging Sam to loop around it.

 

Jack was a blank and knew Sam had two soulmarks. Aside from the stigma that resulted from soulmarks that society deemed deviant, they were also harsh on those born without a mark. Harsh words of soulless, deviant, homewrecker and other callous words were often associated with blanks.

 

Sam gave Jack an encouraging squeeze with his pinkie. Scott's grandmother looked on with a twinkle remembering two men who shyly navigated something similar. Her family would do the same as they had done in the past.

 

“Now you too if you ever need a place to stay, or to feel comfortable you are always welcome here. We always have room and the more the merrier. We always have a spare room available,” Scott’s grandmother smiled.

 

Sam thought about the comment she had made earlier.

 

“Ma’am, who were you talking about earlier?”

 

“Hm? Oh, yes, my brother and his best friend. They fought in the great war but both were lost to it.”

 

“I'm sorry,” Sam said feeling a poke in the side from Jack.

 

“ Pish tosh, none of that,” Scott's grandmother chided, “I’m an old woman so many of my immediate family have gone. Besides aside from the Smithsonian there's not been much interest in the younger sister of a war hero.”

 

“I'd like to hear about you, and them,” Sam said, “if you don’t mind.”

 

“Very well then, I can't imagine any young ‘uns wanting to spend this time with an old woman.” Scott's grandmother said chuckling as she watched the four teens gathered around on the floor while Scott's grandmother sat in her recliner. On her lap were letters, the few photographs of them as children and into adulthood, and trinkets they had sent back from abroad.

 

“My name is Rebecca Penelope Barnes Proctor,” Rebecca started.

 

“Wait, Barnes?” Sam whispered loudly who was shushed by Anijah.

 

“Holy hell,” Jack whispered as loudly immediately scolded by Rebecca with a “language, dear.”

 

That afternoon they learned all about Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers. Sam ignored the heat that pooled in his gut. They were dead war heroes he admonished himself and if they were alive they'd have been very old war heroes.

 

The rest of Sam's time at high school was filled with memories of Jack, Anijah and Scott. Anijah and Scott attended each dance, prom, and party as a couple. Whereas Jack would often take the first girl to ask him while Sam would go alone claiming to be a bachelor for life. Often times the four of them would go to a party where Jack would maintain his reputation as a lady’s man. After the party though Jack and Sam would often end up at Sam’s home or at Rebecca’s home. They’d spend the rest of the night talking, reminiscing, and learning every nook and cranny of each other’s body.

 

Sam and Jack lost their virginity the night of senior prom. They rented a hotel room where Sam pulled out all the romantic tropes he could think of: the petals on the bed, the candles, the massage oil, everything to make their night as memorable as possible. Jack and Sam lay in each other’s arms excited for the graduation to come. Soon they’d be able to move to university where Sam and Jack would have much more freedom. Jack had been staying with Sam’s family since having his parents learn about his relationship with Sam.

 

After high school, Anijah went to Boston to attend Harvard with the intent of pursuing a degree in microbial sciences and a secondary concentration in neurobiology while Scott had gone to attend M.I.T. to achieve a double major in Computer Science and engineering and mechanical engineering. When Anijah graduated from the undergraduate program Scott and Anijah were to marry and continue their studies both wanting to further their degree. Sam and Jack headed to Washington D.C. to attend university. Sam attended George Washington University looking to obtain a bachelor in human science and a minor in public health whereas Jack attended Georgetown University to obtain degrees in international affairs and peace studies. They both joined the ROTC program at each university. Sam and Jack lived off campus in an apartment nearby fully able to make their relationship public. There was something about walking hand in hand or enjoying the parks nearby.

 

They had passed the qualifications to become pararescuemen. The training was an intense two years known as “superman training.” They had signed up to do a 6 year enlistment contract with the intent upon entering the Air Force on the GTEP and receiving a bonus upon completing the training. They had finished their training when both were only 23 years old. Jack and Sam were deployed to Afghanistan. Sam had decided to further his studies with a masters in Psychology.

 

They served together. They had a studio apartment in a burrough near Boston close to Anijah and Scott. Anijah had become Anijah Bennett Proctor. She was obtaining a PH.D. with the intent of becoming a professor while Scott worked with a prominent tech company. They had married as soon as Anijah had graduated. By the time Anijah was twenty five, she had twin boys and a girl. Before long Jack and Sam became test pilots for the Exo-7 Falcon. Such was their life. Jack would stroke Sam’s soulmarks with Sam assuring Jack that nothing could separate them.

 

2006 was not a good year for Sam. It was supposed to be a standard PJ rescue op. They had done it thousands of time. Yet an RPG knocked Jack out of the sky. Sam could only look on as he screamed his name. “Riley,” Sam yelled, taking to calling Jack by his last name while they were in active duty. He continued to scream his name until it was hoarse hating that he could do nothing. He had lost more than his wingman. He had lost his best friend. He had lost his lover, his soulmate, soulmark be damned.

 

Sam found it increasingly difficult to serve. He had one year left on the contract. His nights were plagued with nightmares of Jack falling out of the sky. Anijah and Scott were there for Sam. They had felt the loss of Jack keenly as well. When his contract was up Sam wanted out. He couldn’t do it anymore.

 

He sat in their studio apartment. The soft music of Billie Holiday on vinyl filled the room. Sam stroked a picture of the two of them while they were deployed. An overwhelming sadness had settled deep in the very fiber of his being. The nightmares, the sadness, the anger had been too much. Upon Anijah’s urging, Sam sought counseling through the VA. It was there that Sam felt his calling.

 

Sam decided to attend Widener University’s Military and Veteran Behavioral Health Post-Master’s certificate program. He wanted to deal with his pain and trauma but also help those who had their own trauma. It was the nurturer in him. He felt this encompassing compassion for those who had suffered while in deployment.

 

What Sam didn’t know was that the lifetime of always being true to himself meant he was going to meet his soulmates soon.


	2. Chapter Two "Who are... Help me?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few things: I used Anthony Mackie's birthday for Sam's birthday. To figure out Riley's birthday I used the September to September birthday rule and decided that Riley was born in 1979 rather than 1978. (I also used a website to figure out what dates were most compatible for those born on September 23rd).
> 
> Something else I touched on was the Don't Ask, Don't Tell that was in effect from 1994 to 2011 (not saying much more as it spoiling the story when you read it you will understand.)
> 
> Basically, a good majority of the story is a truncated version of the plot for Winter Soldier and Civil War. Using the movie timeline, I am setting the last "scene" of this chapter before they end up in Wakanda. I am also aware of what waits for them in the later movies of the timeline but I'm not including it in this chapter. If someone else wants to write about the Infinity War events means for Steve, have at it.
> 
> I hope the second chapter of the story does the first chapter justice. It took me years to get over my crippling self-doubt. However, I wrote the last scene first and then the other parts fell into place. 
> 
> Hope you like, please read and review.

“On your left,” Sam heard the other jogger say as they passed by him. It was always something that would give him an initial thrill. Every single time Sam would build his hope up. One thing though he would then have to do was wait out was see if the other jogger would pass him again. When he was younger he was sure this had to be a mistake. He was the fastest jogger in his class and his school on field day for each year in each group first in the kindergarten and first grade, then second and third grade, then the fourth, fifth and sixth grades. Except for the one year he was sick during fifth grade that he was not able to participate with Jack winning instead. Sam could never begrudge Jack. Yet there was the competitive side in him that hated that he was being bested at something he excelled at.

 

After the second “on your left” Sam could only reply with a snarky “On my left, got it.” He was more preoccupied that the other jogger was clearly enjoying beating him. It was also clear that upon the third “on your left” the other jogger was messing with him. His younger self would have outright balked adult Sam had been “beaten” three times. 

 

“Don’t say it, don’t you say it,” Sam said becoming increasingly out of breath and upon hearing that ‘on your left’ yelled out a “Come on.”

 

Sam had tried to sprint after his soulmate. There was no catching him though. He knew he’d have to wait until they were both done jogging. The banter that had just taken place meant that the other jogger had realized what Sam had said and its significance.

 

In their first conversation, the banter continued. Sam realizing that his soulmate was Steve Rogers also known as Captain America. It did not take much to figure this out given there were not many American soldiers that could run thirteen miles in thirty minutes. Despite being winded and tired, Sam couldn’t help but admire Steve’s handsomeness. Whoever provided Steve with his workout clothes clearly knew what they were doing in purchasing the very fitted top. Sam let an internal thanks to whomever was responsible. 

 

He wanted to continue but he was not sure how to do so. How does one approach the subject of having Captain America as their soulmate? More so when outright doing so and too desperately would make him look like every other person who were only interested in Steve in his looks or abilities. 

 

Sam enjoyed their banted. It came naturally to both of them. Steve talking about having a late start and Sam giving it right back about feeling ashamed and running another lap. They both continued the conversation for what Sam recognized it for what it was. Steve casually asking what unit he had been with and his responding with the 58th pararescue. Maybe it was a way of Steve vetting Sam, or maybe it was the soulmate that was urging them to get to know each other. They were very much into each other that much was clear.

 

“Steve Rogers.”

 

“I kind of put that together. Must have freaked you out coming home after the whole defrosting thing.”

 

“It takes some getting used to. It's good to meet you, Sam.”

 

‘He said my name,’ Sam thought. He really liked it when Steve had said his name. Then there was this overwhelming urge to continue their conversation. Anything to keep Steve talking and looking at Sam. The pool of heat was building in the very core of Sam. All these years after dealing with the discrimination, the bullying, the overall bullshit and here standing in front of him was his soulmate. He needed to say something, anything.

 

“It's your bed, right?” Sam asked.

 

“What's that?” Steve responded a bit confused about the question not so much why someone would ask but that someone had thought to ask. Ever since he had been defrosted no one gave much thought about what it was like for a military soldier coming back to civilian life. They were mostly preoccupied with his transitioning from someone in the 1940s to the new the millennia. 

“Your bed, it's too soft. When I was over there I'd sleep on the ground and use rock for pillows, like a caveman. Now I'm home, lying in my bed, and it's like…” Sam replied.

 

“Lying on a marshmallow. Feel like I'm gonna sink right to the floor,” Steve responded. He felt a lightness in a chest he had not felt for some time. There was something about a soulmate understanding a side of one’s self or at least acknowledging it. It felt good.

 

Their conversation continued as Sam offered another item to Steve’s list of what he needed to catch up. They wanted to continue to talk but duty called. Sam reiterated that he worked at the VA and it’d be nice to see Steve there. Steve agreed. Natasha only smiled as she saw the two men. After Steve and Natasha’s banter did she finally ask.

 

“Potential date,” Natasha asked.

 

“No, soulmate,” Steve said.

 

“Interesting,” was Natasha’s reply.

 

Steve met with Sam again after one of Sam’s sessions. He was struck by Sam’s empathy and insight. He could see himself falling in love with Sam easily. They spoke about the meeting. 

 

“Yeah, brother, we all got the same problems. Guilt, regret.” Sam said while he busied himself with organizing and cleaning up a table that did not need it. Steve knew for what it was.

 

“You lose someone?” Steve asked.

 

“My wingman, Riley. Flying a night mission.Standard PJ rescue op, nothing we hadn't done a thousand times before, till RPG knock Riley's dumb ass out of the sky. Nothing I could do. It's like I was up there just to watch.”

 

What Sam hadn’t intoned was how much Riley meant to him. He still had a hard time coming to terms with being so open with his relationship when it came to talking about it in the capacity of the military. He had spent so long compartmentalizing their relationship much as Riley had done as well. So he often felt distant and cold talking about it.

 

“I’m sorry,” Steve said, noticing something that Sam was not saying and feeling for Sam. He knew what it was like to lose a loved one.

 

“After that, I had really hard time finding a reason for being over there, you know?” Sam replied thinking about the hardship and heartache.

 

“But you're happy now, back in the world?” Steve asked, worried about this soulmate.

 

“Hey, the number of people giving me orders is down to about zero. So, hell, yeah. You thinking about getting out?” Sam asked.

 

“No. I don't know. To be honest, I don't know what I would do with myself if I did.” Steve replied and feeling this sense of wonder of being kept on his toes. In a short time, Sam had cut down to the very root of it all. First, recognizing that Steve above all was a military getting used to civilian life. Second, that he was someone who had fought a war to suddenly wonder what to do with his life. He was made to be a soldier of war by Erskine. Even if he had been a good person, he was made to stop World War II.

 

“Ultimate fighting? It's just a great idea off the top of my head. But seriously, you could do whatever you want to do. What makes you happy?” Sam said laughing with Steve.

 

“I don't know,” Steve sincerely said, leaving a “but I want to discover this with you.” 

 

The connection they shared would give Steve a place to regroup when everything went to shit. There was the murder of Nick Fury. Then there was the STRIKE team attacking him in the elevator at headquarters. Then seeing Armin Zola’s face on the computer and learning the awful truth: that S.H.I.E.L.D. was infiltrated at every possible level and position with Hydra.

 

Steve and Natasha ended up at the one place he knew he could trust and likewise felt most like home. 

 

“Hey, man,” Sam said upon opening the door and seeing Steve. He noticed his disheveled state and knew his soulmate was in trouble and needed help.

 

“I'm sorry about this. We need a place to lay low.” Sam listened to Steve.

 

“Everyone we know is trying to kill us,” Natasha said and Sam paused hearing the concern in her voice.

 

“Not everyone,” Sam said as he let Steve and Natasha enter.

 

After Steve and Natasha cleaned up, had breakfast they discussed about who was responsible for calling in the strike and who else could have been involved. They wondered on how they could kidnap a high ranking S.H.I.E.L.D. officer. That’s when Sam threw down his file, his resume as it were.

 

“Dude, Captain America needs my help. There's no better reason to get back in,” Sam stated matter-of-factly and after Natasha’s pointed look, “And you’re my soulmate.”

 

Steve smiled, “I’m your soulmate.”

 

They then discussed about stealing the EXO-7 Falcon from Fort Meade that was behind three guarded gates and a twelve inch steel wall. Steve said it would not be a problem after Natasha’s shrug.

 

Then there was the Winter Soldier.

 

No, Bucky.

 

Steve felt so much guilt over what had happened to Bucky. When they were captured and talking about how Bucky had not recognized Steve. “Zola. Bucky's whole unit was captured in '43, Zola experimented on him. Whatever he did helped Bucky survive the fall. They must have found him and…” He didn’t want to hear about how it wasn’t his fault.

 

He wanted Bucky. He wanted Bucky to remember. He wanted Bucky to meet Sam. He was sure that Bucky would have liked Sam. No, Steve’s brain scolded, will like.

 

With the battle of the Triskelion in the past all Steve and Sam knew was that hey had to find Bucky. They needed to find their triad and help him. Bucky had remembered and had saved Steve’s life. He had fished him from the river and left him on the riverbank. 

 

Some weeks later, they stood in front of Fury’s grave whose occupant had already left to make a way for himself as a dead man. Natasha too had already left for a much needed vacation after handing Steve a file on Bucky.

 

“You’re going after him,” Sam asked.

 

“You don't have to come with me,” Steve responded as he looked at Bucky’s picture.

 

“I know. When do we start?” Sam replied.

 

It would take time but they’d find him.

 

***

 

To anyone else it would seem foolhardy to believe this was Steve’s Bucky. However knowing that Sam and Steve were soulmates it would stand to reason that Steve could sense Bucky. Even if remembering Sarah’s name and that Steve stuffed his shoes with newspaper was definitely a bit thin on the proof. However, Sam trusted Steve.

 

It was then when Sam went back to Bucky and kneeled in front of him.

 

“We’re here to help you,” Sam said looking at Bucky directly, “I know a guy.”

 

There had been a choked sob from Bucky as he sat there trapped. The hope he felt was all too quickly soaked into the desert of his psyche. Surely this couldn’t be the moment when he met his soulmate.  He could feel this helpless panic build in him.

 

“Who are…” Bucky struggled to get out the words. They were stuck in his mouth. His mouth was too dry, too sticky, and his throat struggled to form the words so he fought to get two words more important, “Help me.”

 

Sam held back a gasp. He knew that Bucky was his soulmate. After meeting Steve, he knew that he’d one day meet Bucky. He also knew that ever since he was a kid, he wanted to help his soulmate. Sam never knew how he’d be able to help. Yet now, he knew exactly what Bucky needed at the moment. He’d call Scott Lang. They’d figure out how to rescue Bucky.

 

From there, Sam would take a day at a time. It was the only thing they could do while they figured out how to help Bucky.

 

“This would have been a lot easier a week ago,” Sam said frustrated at the turn of events. Sam stood up to stand next to Steve as they looked onto the situation. They both contemplated on what to do and who to call. Tony had been out as he had signed the accords likely restricting him from helping. It was fortunate that Sam had known a guy. A guy who he hoped wouldn’t go into full detail about their scrimmage. 

 

With the Avengers fractured after Stark signed the Accords, Steve refusing to cooperate in handing over his soulmate and the battle that happened at Flughafen Leipzig-Halle Airport in Schkeuditz, Saxony. They did not have much time after Steve and Bucky had rescued their team from the Raft. 

 

***

 

Sam stood in front of Jack's grave. He had been buried by his parents in Cypress Hills National Cemetery near their childhood home. Given the nature of their work, Sam and Jack had often talked late into the night about their lives together after they finished their service. Undoubtedly, they would sometimes discuss what were to happen if something were to happen to them. One thing Sam and Jack had promised each other would be that they’d be buried near where they felt most like home: Washington D.C. Yet, both knew that ultimately it would rely on their respective families following their wishes. Sam could only feel anguish when his parents had refused to acknowledge Sam’s importance in Jack’s life. They refused to listen to him or Jack’s wishes nor would they allow Sam to have Jack’s dog tags, much less the folded flag. They were blinded by their discrimination and their grief. It was something that Sam could never forgive.

 

His tombstone had read July 28th, 1979 to September 15th, 2006. He was only 27 years old when the mission had gone awry, it was days away from Sam’s birthday, and months from when they’d retire so that they could live the life openly the way they had wanted. As long as they were in the military they would never be able to openly come out as a couple. That had been the plan they had come together the night prior to their mission in Afghanistan. They’d marry in Boston with their closest friends and family. Jack had fallen asleep whispering his new name: Jack Riley-Wilson with Sam whispering his new name: Sam Riley-Wilson and peppering soft kisses on his cheek. Somehow Sam had managed to finish his mission in capturing Khandil, but it had done nothing on the rage and despair about Riley’s death.

 

Sam, seeing Jack’s grave, felt this overwhelmingly amount of grief shake the very core of his frame. Jack should have survived. Jack should have been with Sam. When Sam stroked Riley’s epitaph of being a loving and dedicated  son and brother with a quote from George Patton, “It is a proud privilege to be a good soldier --a good soldier [with] discipline, self-respect, pride in his unit and his country, a high sense of duty and obligation to comrades and to his superiors, and a self confidence born of demonstrated ability.” 

 

Sam could hear the soft steps of Steve approach him. Steve stood silently right behind Sam’s right shoulder grabbing onto his hand. He was reading Riley’s grave. Sam could feel his mouth twitch in attempt to keep his emotions in check. He appreciated Steve’s comforting silence as they held hands.

 

He could then hear the heavier steps of Bucky approach his left side. He too had read Riley’s headstone. Bucky had wrapped his arm around Sam. 

 

“I heard he was a real stand up guy from Scott and Anijah,” Bucky had said while giving Sam a tight squeeze, “I’m sorry we couldn’t have met him.”

 

“Me too,” Sam said quietly, “We’d always talk about my soulmarks and I’d do everything to reassure him that he would always have a place in my life. We had wanted to have a military career but we weren’t able to be open about our relationship.”

 

Steve and Bucky hugged Sam harder. They had learned about the horrible conditions of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell that had been in effect from 1994 through 2011. Sam bit his lip as he felt grief grow from his chest. He let out a cry for the past that Jack had gone through with his family denying the love and acceptance he was owed, the present that denied Jack of the relationship that he had a right to, and the future taken too quickly away from his mission.

 

“We were years away from being able to be open in the military,” Sam said quietly, “That’s why we were going to retire after our second tour to where we lived in Boston. Massachusetts had approved same sex marriage since ‘04. We were going to become ‘Wilson-Riley.’

 

“You know,” Steve said quietly, “I would have loved to have met him. Even if fate deemed us soulmates, Sam, had Jack been here, we would have welcomed him in our lives.”

 

“That’s right, Sam,” Bucky smiled, “You would have never lost us. We would have figured it out. We would have never loved you less. We have loved you more for being true to who you are and you and Jack loving each other despite the hardship. We would have never made you feel bad about it.”

 

“No fucking way,” Steve said causing Sam to chuckle, who had loved seeing the side of Steve, that most people didn’t get to see, “We love you Sam. We would have also loved Jack, I know it.”

 

Bucky had put some white lilies on Jack’s grave. He laid his hand on the gravestone and said a silent prayer. While Steve had also done the same thing. Sam then laid his hand on top of their hands. 

 

“We’re here,” Steve said, with Bucky finishing Steve’s sentence, “To ask Jack’s blessing on accepting Sam as part of our triad.” 

 

“We promise to love Samuel Thomas Wilson,” Steve started as Buck continued.

 

“To have and to hold from this forward,” Bucky said softly.

 

“For better, for worse,” Steve continued.

 

“For richer, for poorer,” Bucky responded.

 

“In sickness, in health,” Steve said.

 

“To love and cherish,” Steve and Bucky finished together.

 

“Really, guys,” Sam said noticing the ray of sunlight recalling the movie Evelyn that he and Jack had seen, Jack was at peace, he was here with them, “wedding vows?”

 

“We wanted to let Jack know we were serious,” Bucky said more seriously than he normally acted with Sam, “and in some way, we wanted Jack to know that when we have our ceremony, Sam, that he’s very much a part of us.”

 

“Even if it’s only in spirit,” Steve said kissing the side of Sam’s head, “he’s a part of us.”

 

“You guys really are determined on seeing me cry,” Sam said smiling with teary eyes.

 

“Only out of happiness,” Bucky said kissing the other side of Sam’s head.

 

“So, I happen to know a guy,” Steve said with a mischievous smirk.

 

Sam squinted his eyes at Steve then saw the shit-eating grin that Bucky was wearing. They knew. Scott in his fanboy exclamations had told them the story. They undoubtedly had gotten the cctv footage.

 

“We did,” Bucky said confirming Sam’s thoughts, “It was a great watch.”

 

“You both are such punks,” Sam said laughing and shaking his head as they exited the cemetery to head to their destination: Wakanda.

 

“We’re your punks,” Steve said they each held hands and shared kisses as they prepared for their destination.

**Author's Note:**

> I would appreciate feedback since it's been years since I've really written anything. I want to get back into it and thanks to my real life friends and their support (so sweet! c: ) here is the first installment. And yes I am nervous...


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